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Christmas Fruit cake Recipe

Christmas Fruit cake Recipe - Frankly, I always suspected that this is how they made fruitcake ...
Christmas Fruit cake Recipe – Frankly, I always suspected that this is how they made fruitcake … Ingredients Needed: ————- 4 Oz. Fruit Bits 1 Railroad Tie Wood Saw Large Rubber Mallot Safety Goggles WEAR YOUR SAFETY GOGGLES. (Children: Get help from an adult!) Cut a one-foot section from...
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12 Days of Christmas Memo

12 Days of Christmas Memo | Santa Claus - I know that corporate downsizing is inevitable in American business ... but at the North Pole?
12 Days of Christmas Memo | Santa Claus – I know that corporate downsizing is inevitable in American business … but at the North Pole? 12 Days of Christmas CORPORATE MEMO To: All Staff Date: December 1 Subject: New “Twelve Days of Christmas” Policy The recent announcement that Donner and Blitzen have elected to...
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Coming home for Christmas

Coming home for Christmas – How can a father telling his adult son that he’s planning to get a divorce lead to a happy and funny Christmas punchline? Read on and find out! An old man in Miami calls up his son in New York and says, “Listen, your...
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Christmas string

Christmas string
One Christmas Eve, when all the presents had been wrapped, there were just three pieces of string left. “€˜You know, we’ll probably just be thrown on the fire,”€™ String Number 1 said. “€˜Or in the garbage!”€™ String Number 2 moaned. “€˜We can’t have that!”€™ String Number 3 cried. “€˜So...
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‘Twas the Night Before Christmas at the Mall

Christmas bag of presents
‘Yet another parody of Clement Moore’s ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas’ – but with a very good, and touching, point in the final two verses Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the mall, Not a creature was idle, shoppers least of all; The merchandise was placed...
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Twas the night before Christmas – clown version

poetry – ‘Twas the night before Christmas – a clown version T’€™was the night before Christmas and all through our towns The birthday King has summoned His clowns Clowns to bring joy in the midst of the night, Clowns to share happiness for children’s delight. With strange colored...
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Tis not the season

Tis not the season - A parody of Deck the Halls talking about the perversion of what Christmas is supposed to be about - suitable for clown skits
Tis not the season – A parody of Deck the Halls talking about the perversion of what Christmas is supposed to be about – suitable for clown skits (To the tune of “€œDeck The Halls”) ‘Tis the season to be greedy!Fa la la la la, La la la...
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Republicans versus Democrats on celebrating Christmas

Republicans versus Democrats on celebrating Christmas – And you thought you could tell Republicans from Democrats by how they vote. Not so! Just observe how they act during the holidays…… Republican say “Merry Christmas!” Democrats say “Happy Holidays!”€ Republicans help the poor during the holidays by sending $50 to...
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Is Santa Claus a Time Lord?

Is Santa Claus a Time Lord?
Is Santa Claus a Time Lord? I have figured out how you can explain Santa Claus to your children. Clearly, Santa is a Time Lord from Gallifrey, like Doctor Who. Here are my solutions to the most common objections: 1) How does he fit all the toys in...
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