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If They Married

If They Married – Very funny list of celebrity names, after hypothetical marriage, i.e. if Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she’d be Dolly Dali

  • If Yoko Ono married Sonny Bono, divorced him, and married U2’€™s Bono, she’€™d be Yoko Ono Bono Bono.
  • If Betty White (The Golden Girls) married Suge Knight, she’€™d be Betty White-Knight.
  • If Dolly Parton married Salvador Dali, she’€™d be Dolly Dali.
  • If Bo Derek married Don Ho, she’€™d be Bo Ho.
  • If Cocoa Chanel married Iggy Pop, she’€™d be Cocoa Pop.
  • If Oprah Winfrey married Depak Chopra, she’€™d be Oprah Chopra.
  • If Cat Stevens married Snoop Doggy Dogg, he’€™d be Cat Doggy Dogg.
  • If Olivia Newton-John married Wayne Newton, then divorced him to marry Elton John, she’€™d be Olivia Newton-John Newton John.
  • If Sondra Locke married Elliott Ness, then divorced him to marry Herman Munster, she’€™d become Sondra Locke Ness Munster.
  • If Bea Arthur married Sting, she’€™d be Bea Sting.
  • If Liv Ullman married Judge Lance Ito, then divorced him and married Jerry Mathers, she’€™d be Liv Ito Beaver.
  • If Snoop Doggy Dogg married Winnie the Pooh, he’€™d be Snoop Doggy Dogg Pooh.
  • If Boog Powell married Felipe Alou, he’€™d be Boog Alou.
  • If G. Gordon Liddy married Boutros-Boutros Ghali, then divorced him to marry Kenny G., he’€™d be G. Ghali G.
  • Nog (Quark’€™s brother on “Star Trek: Deep Space Nine”) has no other name, so he uses it twice when getting a marriage license. If he married Howard Hughes, and then Pamela Dare, he’€™d be Nog Nog Hughes Dare.
  • If Javier Lopez married Keiko the whale, and Edith Piaf married Rose To the elephant, they would be Javier Keiko and Edith Tu.
  • If Ivana Trump married, in succession, Orson Bean (actor), King Oscar (of Norway), Louis B. Mayer (of MGM), and Norbert Wiener (mathematician), she would then be Ivana Bean Oscar Mayer Wiener.

One thought on “If They Married

  1. Carlos says:

    If Shirley MacLaine married Tom Ewell, Johnny Rotten, and Alan Hale; her name would be: Shirley Ewell-Rotten-Hale.

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