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Funny movie quotes from The Princess and The Pirate

Funny movie quotes from The Princess and The Pirate starring Bob Hope, Virginia Mayo, Walter Slezak, Walter Brennan

Princess Margaret (Virginia Mayo): I hear there are pirates in these waters.

Sylvester (Bob Hope): Yeah? Well, let them stay in the water, they’re dangerous on ships!

Sylvester (Bob Hope): I’ll chop off his liver! Say, that might be pretty good, chopped liver.

Sylvester (Bob Hope): If you don’t tell anybody I’m not a gypsy, I won’t tell anybody you’re not an idiot.

Sylvester (Bob Hope): My act is known all over Europe; that’s why I’m going to America.

Princess Margaret (Virginia Mayo): Why don’t you die like a man?

Sylvester (Bob Hope): [disguised in woman’s clothes] Because I’d rather live like a woman!

Don José Ramon Sebastian Rurales: [after Sylvester and tavern owner share a few short beers] Well done stranger, I like a man who can drink like that! And now, you are going to drink with me! Hugo, bring it over here! [waiter drops giant barrel of beer on the table]

Featherhead [Walter Brennan]: You can’t miss him. He looks just like me. He’s twice as smart as I am.

Sylvester (Bob Hope): Oh, a half-wit, huh?

Owner of the ‘Bucket of Blood’: You sound like a stranger. You haven’t lived very long in this town, huh?

Sylvester (Bob Hope): Does anybody?

Sylvester (Bob Hope): Look at them building that gallows out there. They’re not going to use that noose to rope a moose. That’s slumber lumber.

Sylvester (Bob Hope): Wait a minute. Why are you in such a sweat to get rid of it now?

Featherhead [Walter Brennan]: ‘Cause I’m smarter than you are, and I’m only an idiot.

Sylvester (Bob Hope): How do you like that? The king. Hi, your honor. How’s the queen and all the little Jacks? I’m a card, ha, ha!

Sylvester (Bob Hope): [During written description of blood-thirsty LaRoche, Sylvester pops up as bubble] That’s not me folks, I come on later, I play a coward.

Sylvester (Bob Hope): I work my brains out for nine reels, and some bit player from Paramount comes over and steals my girl. That’s the last picture I’ll ever make for Goldwyn!

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