Home » Funny quotes » Quotes about women

Quotes about women

Quotes about women – Very funny, and all-too-often true, quotes about women, from a variety of sources

  • Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.— Unknown
  • A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon.—Arnold Haultain
  • Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right – instantly.—Sam Slick (Thomas Chandler Haliburton)
  • A highbrow is a man who has found something more interesting than women.—Edgar Wallace
  • It upsets women to be, or not to be, stared at hungrily.—Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic’s Notebook, 1960
  • I’d rather have two girls at seventeen than one at thirty-four.—Fred Allen
  • All women are basically in competition with each other for a handful of eligible men.—Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966
  • A woman wears her tears like jewelry.— Unknown
  • No woman wants to see herself too clearly.—Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966
  • The girls that are always easy on the eyes are never easy on the heart.—Unknown
  • Men enjoy being thought of as hunters, but are generally too lazy to hunt. Women, on the other hand, love to hunt, but would rather nobody knew it.—Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966
  • Men at most differ as Heaven and Earth, but women, worst and best, as Heaven and Hell.—Alfred Lord Tennyson
  • Men look at themselves in mirrors. Women look for themselves.—Elissa Melamed
  • There are three things men can do with women: love them, suffer for them, or turn them into literature.—Stephen Stills
  • It is because of men that women dislike one another.—Jean de La Bruyère, Characters, 1688
  • If you are ever in doubt as to whether to kiss a pretty girl, always give her the benefit of the doubt.—Thomas Carlyle
  • A woman can look both moral and exciting… if she also looks as if it was quite a struggle.—Edna Ferber
  • Do you not know I am a woman? when I think, I must speak.—William Shakespeare, As You Like It
  • Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember.— Unknown
  • Women like silent men. They think they’re listening.—Marcel Achard, Quote, 4 November 1956
  • Good-looking girls break hearts, and goodhearted girls mend them.—Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook, 1966
  • The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.— Unknown
  • Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman’s weapon is her tongue.—Hermione Gingoldtcalf
  • Women are like elephants to me. I like to look at them, but I wouldn’t want to own one.—W.C. Fields
  • The rarest thing in the world is a woman who is pleased with photographs of herself.—Elizabeth Metcalf
  • A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are.—Chauncey Mitchell Depew
  • Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women.—Nicole Hollander

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *