Funny movie quotes from Captain Marvel (2019)

Funny movie quotes from Captain Marvel (2019) starring Brie Larson, Samuel L. Jackson

Funny movie quotes from Captain Marvel (2019) starring Brie Larson, Samuel L. Jackson

Carol Danvers: I slipped.
Yon-Rogg: Right. You slipped. As a result of me punching you in the face.
Carol Danvers: I was already slipping when you happened to punch me in the face. The two of those are not related.


Carol Danvers: You have three names. What do people call you?
Nick Fury: Fury.
Carol Danvers: Just Fury?
Nick Fury: Yep. Not Nicholas. Not Joseph. Just Fury.
Carol Danvers: What does your mother call you then?
Nick Fury: Fury.
Carol Danvers: What do your friends call you?
Nick Fury: Fury.
Carol Danvers: Kids?
Nick Fury: If I ever have them? Fury.


Maria Rambeau: You call me ‘young lady’ again, I’ll shove my foot up somewhere it’s not supposed to be.
[awkward silence]
Talos: Am I supposed to guess where that is?


Carol Danvers: [Referring to the front of the baseball cap that Fury has given her] What is this?
Nick Fury: It’s a S.H.I.E.L.D. logo.
Carol Danvers: Does announcing your identity with branded clothing, help with the covert part of the job?
Nick Fury: …said the space soldier who’s wearing a rubber suit.


Nick Fury: Coulson. New guy. Guess he doesn’t hate me yet.


Nick Fury: You know anything about a lady blowing up a Blockbuster? Witnesses say she was dressed for laser tag.


Maria Rambeau: [to Carol] Your plan is to leave the atmosphere in a craft not designed for the journey, and you anticipate hostile encounters with a technologically superior foreign enemy. Correct?
[Carol nods]
Monica Rambeau (11 Years Old): That’s what I’m saying. You have to go!
Maria Rambeau: Monica.
Monica Rambeau (11 Years Old): You have a chance to fly the coolest mission in the history of missions. And you’re going to give it up to sit on the couch and watch Fresh Prince with me? I just think you should consider what kind of example you’re setting for your daughter.


Carol Danvers: Name a detail so bizarre, a Skrull can never fabricate it.
Nick Fury: If a toast is cut diagonally, I can’t eat it.
Nick Fury: You didn’t need that, did you?
Carol Danvers: No. No, I didn’t. But I enjoyed it.


Nick Fury: So… you’re not from around here.
Carol Danvers: It’s hard to explain.


Korath: You think you’re funny, but I’m not laughing.
Att-Lass: You never laugh.
Korath: I laugh, on the inside. And I’m not doing it now.


[At-Lass scans Goose]
Kree Computer: Species: Flerken. Threat: High.
[At-Lass clamps a muzzle on Goose]
Nick Fury: It’s a cat, not Hannibal Lecter.
[At-Lass scans Fury]
Kree Computer: Species: Human Male. Threat: Low to None.
Nick Fury: That thing’s clearly busted.


Carol Danvers: You knew all along. Is that why we never hung out?
Minn-Erva: No, I just never liked you.


Maria Rambeau: Can I ask you something? Do you just turn into anything you want?
Talos: Ah well, I have to see it first.
Maria Rambeau: Can you all do it?
Talos: Physiologically, yeah. But it takes practice and, um, dare I say it, talent to do it well.
Nick Fury: Can you turn into a cat?
Talos: What’s a cat?
Maria Rambeau: What about a filing cabinet?
Talos: Why would I turn into a filing cabinet?
Nick Fury: A venus fly trap. I’ll give you $50 right now if you turn into a venus fly trap.


Author

Tom Raymond

Professional clown who loves to laugh - happily married for 29 years, with 5 children and 1 grandson. Servant of Jesus Christ.

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