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Funny movie quotes for Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy

Funny movie quotes for Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy (1955) starring Bud Abbott, Lou Costello, Richard Deacon, Marie Windsor

Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): How stupid can you get?
Abbott and Costello Meet the Mummy - Lou as a snake charmerFreddie Franklin (Lou Costello): How stupid do you want me to be?


Madame Rontru (Marie Windsor): [looking at a fluoroscope of Freddie’€™s insides] A marble, two buttons, a safety pin …
Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): I lost a tie clasp two years ago, see if that’€™s in there.


Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): Ask Klaris, he’€™s the one that got us into this.
Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): And he’€™s going to get us out of it.


The Flower Girl: Flowers?
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): [points to one bunch of flowers] How much are these?
The Flower Girl: A dollar.
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): [points to another bunch] How much are these?
The Flower Girl: A dollar.
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): I got no money.
[throws a bouquet back on the tray]
The Flower Girl: No money?
[picks up the bunch he threw back]
The Flower Girl: They’€™re a little wilted, you can have them for nothing.


Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): [finding Professor Zoomer’€™s body dressed in his long underwear] Is this the body you found earlier?
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): Yeah, but before he had clothes on.


Waiter with Flaming Kabob: A waiter will be with you in a moment.
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): Hey! The meat’€™s on fire!
[throws a glass of water at the kabob but hits Abbott instead]


Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): Where will we find the Mummy?
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): Don’€™t worry. the Mummy will find you!


Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): I overheard Doctor Zoomer say he needed a couple of men to accompany his mummy back to the States.
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): Is she afraid to travel by herself?
Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): She? No, Lou. This mummy is a he. What’€™s wrong with that? Some mummies are men, some mummies are women.
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): Such a strange country.
Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): What’€™s strange about it Lou?
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): Your mummy, your mummy. Wasn’t she a woman?
Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): I never had a mummy.
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): What did your Father do? Win you in a crap game?
Peter Patterson (Bud Abbott): What’€™s the matter?
Freddie Franklin (Lou Costello): I thought you were gonna slap me!


Madame Rontru (Marie Windsor): There is no curse that a gun or a knife can’€™t cure.


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