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Funny movie quotes from Me and My Pal

Funny movie quotes from Me and My Pal, where Oliver Hardy is about to be married, when his best man, Stan Laurel, causes trouble with a … jigsaw puzzle?

Funny movie quotes from  Me and My Pal starring Laurel and Hardy

Oliver (Oliver Hardy): You know what a magnate is, don’t you?
Stanley (Stan Laurel): Sure, it’s a thing that eats cheese.

Oliver (Oliver Hardy): Now why did you get two tickets to Chicago when you know that I wanted to spend my honeymoon in Saskatchewan?
Stanley (Stan Laurel): Well the man said there was no such place as sus – -Swee – Sas…

[learning that Mr. Cucumber is on the phone]
Oliver (Oliver Hardy): [to Stanley] You talk to him.  Tell him I left 10 minutes ago. Go ahead!
Stanley (Stan Laurel): [goes to phone where Mr. Cucumber is angry] Hello?
Peter Cucumber (James Finlayson): Did you know you’re holding up this wedding? Keeping my daughter engaged for over half an hour? Where is Mr. Hardy?
Stanley (Stan Laurel): He’s right here. And he told me to tell you that we just left; 10 minutes ago.
[hangs up]
Peter Cucumber (James Finlayson): [makes his weird eye expression] Da-oh.

Oliver (Oliver Hardy): [doorbell rings; to Hives] See who that is.
Hives, the butler: [to telegram messenger] See who that is.
Telegram messenger: [to policeman] See who that is.
Policeman: [to cabdriver] See who that is.
Cabdriver: [to Stan] See who that is.
Stanley (Stan Laurel): [to Oliver] See who it is.
Oliver (Oliver Hardy): [doorbell rings again] Come in!

Oliver (Oliver Hardy): [shoving Stan] This is all your fault, bringing the jigsaw puzzle here in the first place.

Policeman: There’s a piece missing out of that puzzle and nobody leaves this place ’til we find it.
Peter Cucumber (James Finlayson): What has that got to do with me?
Policeman: You’re going to be searched.
Oliver (Oliver Hardy): You don’t understand, sir, that’s Mr. Peter Cucumber. The big oil magnate.
Policeman: I don’t care if he’s Mr. Dill Pickle, he’s going to be searched!

Peter Cucumber (James Finlayson): [taking the IN MEMORY wreath] I just might have some use for this.

Peter Cucumber (James Finlayson): What are you out to do, make me out a bigger fool than I look?  Er, than I am?

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