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‘Twas the Night before Christmas for Moms

‘€˜Twas the Night before Christmas for Moms – Another parody of ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas’ — but this one is different. Both funny and touching, it’s truly required reading. Merry Christmas, Mom!

‘€™Twas the night before Christmas, when all thru the abode,
only one creature was stirring, and she was cleaning the commode.
The children were finally sleeping, all snug in their beds,
while visions of Nintendo 64 and Barbie, flipped through their heads.

The dad was snoring in front of the TV,
with a half-constructed bicycle on his knee.
So only the mom heard the reindeer hooves clatter,
which made her sigh, ‘€œNow what’€™s the matter?’€

With toilet bowl brush still clutched in her hand,
she descended the stairs, and saw the old man.
He was covered with ashes and soot, which fell with a shrug.
‘€œOh great,’€ muttered the mom, ‘€œNow I have to clean the rug.’€

“Ho-ho-ho!’€ cried Santa, ‘€œI’€™m glad you’€™re awake.’€
‘€œYour gift was especially difficult to make.’€
‘€œThanks, Santa, but all I want is some time alone.’€
‘€œExactly!’€ he chuckled, ‘€œI’€™ve made you a clone.’€

‘€œA clone?’€ she asked, ‘€œWhat good is that?
Run along, Santa, I’€™ve no time for chit-chat.’€

The mother’€™s twin. Same hair, same eyes,
same double chin. ‘€œShe’€™ll cook, she’€™ll dust, ‘€œ
she’€™ll mop every mess. You’€™ll relax, take it easy,
watch The Young & the Restless.’€ ‘€œFantastic!’€ the mom cheered.
‘€œMy dream come true! ‘€œI’€™ll shop. I’€™ll read., I’€™ll sleep a whole night through! ‘€œ

From the room above, the youngest began to fret.
‘€œMommy?! I scared’€¦ and I ‘€˜m wet.’€

The clone replied, ‘€œI’€™m coming, sweetheart.’€
‘€œHey,’€ the mom smiled, ‘€œShe knows her part.’€
The clone changed the small one, and hummed a tune,
as she bundled the child, in a blanket cocoon.

‘€œYou the best mommy ever. ‘€œ I really love you.’€
The clone smiled and sighed, ‘€œI love you, too.’€
The mom frowned and said, ‘€œSorry, Santa, no deal. ‘€œ
That’€™s my child’€™s love, she’€™s trying to steal.’€

Smiling wisely Santa said, ‘€œTo me it is clear, ‘€œ
Only one loving mother, is needed here.’€

The mom kissed her child, and tucked her into bed.
‘€œThank you, Santa, ‘€œ for clearing my head.
I sometimes forget, it won’€™t be very long,
when they’€™ll be too old, for my cradle-song.’€

The clock on the mantle began to chime.
Santa whispered to the clone, ‘€œIt works every time.’€
With the clone by his side Santa said, ‘€œGoodnight.
Merry Christmas, Mom, You’€™ll be alright.

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