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Funny movie quotes from The Bullfighters

Funny movie quotes from The Bullfighters, Laurel and Hardy’s final American film – and very funny!

[debarking from an airplane, Stanley’s shaking his legs]
Oliver Hardy: What’s the matter with you?
Stan Laurel: I haven’t got my air legs.

[finally getting into an empty cab]
Oliver Hardy: At last we’ve got a whole cab all to ourselves.
Stan Laurel: Yes, it was worth waiting for. [eight more men pile in, sitting on top of them]

Checking in at the hotel in The Bullfighters

Stan Laurel: [alarmed, after noticing that McCoy has signed into the hotel guest book with an “X.”] He’s forging my name!
Oliver Hardy: Shhhh!

Richard K. Muldoon: [having found out that Stan has a lookalike – a professional bullfighter] It’s inconceivable that there could be two faces like that!

Stan Laurel: [in a flashback, identifying Muldoon in court] I’m positive that I’m absolutely positive! [Oliver claps in applause]
Judge: Order in the court.
Oliver Hardy: I’m sorry, your honor, but I am positively more positive that he is positive!

Richard K. Muldoon

[Having found out they were responsible for sending an innocent man to prison]
Stan Laurel: Maybe you’d better go up to him and apologize. That’s a terrible thing to do to a fella
Oliver Hardy: I’d better go up to him and apologize? You’re the one who so falsely accused him! Why if you had any spark of manhood left in you right now, you’d go right up to him and apologize.
Stan Laurel: Well okay, I’ll go to…
Hot Shot Coleman: Excuse me, if you’ll take my advice, you’ll never cross his path again. Because he told me if he ever saw you again he was going to skin you alive. “First the little one, then the big one,” he said. “I’LL SKIN THEM BOTH ALIVE!” If you are smart enough, You should get out of town now! Richard K. Muldoon is like an elephant, He never forgets!

Richard K. Muldoon: Well, this fella that looked like you had a friend – a human hippopotamus. Why, if I had that mass of blubber here right now, I’d crush him alive like this.
[he crushes a handful of nuts into small pieces]

Bullfighting

Stan Laurel: I don't want to fight a bull!

Stan Laurel: I don’t want to fight any bulls, I don’t like bulls, [high-pitched-crying] I’m allergic to bulls!

Oliver Hardy: That bull wouldn’t hurt a fly!
Stan Laurel: Yeah, but I’m not a fly!

Oliver Hardy: [as a skeleton] Well, Here’s another nice mess you’ve gotten me into!

Skeletons - here's another nice mess you've gotten me into!

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