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Funny movie quotes from Crime on their Hands

Funny movie quotes from Crime on their Hands, the classic Three Stooges short film – best remembered for the scene where Shemp inadvertently swallows a stolen diamond!

Funny movie quotes from Crime on their Hands

Shemp (Shemp Howard): Moe, Stop the presses.


Moe (Moe Howard): You didn’t see that movie too did ya?
Larry (Larry Fine): No, I’ll take orders chief.
Moe (Moe Howard): Good. [slaps Larry] That was for absolutely nothin’.


Shemp (Shemp Howard): [answering phone] Hello? Yes! Yes! YES! No! No.[click]
Moe (Moe Howard): What was it?
Shemp (Shemp Howard): Wrong number.


Shemp (Shemp Howard): A hundred carats? He sure knew his onions! Hee, hee, hee, hee!
Moe (Moe Howard): Quiet!


Larry (Larry Fine): [upon finding Dapper’s cigar case] Evidence! Let’s weight it!
Shemp (Shemp Howard): Let’s smoke it!


Bea (Chistine McIntyre): Any half-wit can see I’m innocent.
Shemp (Shemp Howard): Yeah, I can see you’re innocent.


Shemp (Shemp Howard): [tossing candy into the air and swallowing it] With oranges, it’s much harder.


Moe (Moe Howard): What happened?
Shemp (Shemp Howard): She fainted.
Moe (Moe Howard): She must have got a good look at your puss.


Moe (Moe Howard): [trying to pull the diamond out of Shemp’s throat with ice tongs] It must be caught on something.
Larry (Larry Fine): Maybe it’s his appendix.
Moe (Moe Howard): We’ll soon find out!


Larry (Larry Fine): We’re trapped like rats!
Moe (Moe Howard): Speak for yourself!


Shemp (Shemp Howard): Cut it out! Cut it out!
Dapper (Kenneth MacDonald): That’s just what we’re planning.


Shemp (Shemp Howard): 50 carats! What an icecube!


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