Funny movie quotes from Whistling in Dixie (1942) starring Red Skelton, Ann Rutherford, Rags Ragland
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): (as Carol is opening a very small box) I ll bet I know what it is one of those new bathing suits the girls are almost wearing this season.
[Editor’s note: bear in mind this film is set during World War II, when the U.S.A. was at war with Japan]
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): What I always wanted – a Japanese beetle.
Carol Lambert (Ann Rutherford): What makes you think it s a Japanese beetle?
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): It s got a yellow belly.
Bellboy: Did you tip her off?
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Yeah, tip. Well, here my good man, here’s a brand new American dollar for you.
Bellboy: That s only a nickel.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): That is the new American dollar after the income tax has been removed.
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): I just heard my brother Sylvester got sent up with the Silver Haven mob. He got 13 years.
Judge Lee (George Kibbee): 13 years? That s bad luck, ain t it?
Ellamae Downs (Diana Lewis): You can call me Ellie.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): If I call you, it ll be collect.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): So you admit your name’s Sylvester!
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): I don’t admit it, I just answer to it.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): I don’t get it.
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Well, look. Originally, I was Sylvester, and Sylvester was Chester. In the hospital they got mixed up, Chester became Sylvester, and I became Chester. People still call Sylvester Chester and me Sylvester. So to save trouble I answer to the name Sylvester and Sylvester answers to the name of Chester. Understand?
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Oh, you’re twins.
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): No, I m Chester. Sylvester was Chester …
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Now don t start that again!
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Mr. Fuller, if it ll make it any easier, why don t you forget Chester and Sylvester and call me by my nickname.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): What’s that?
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Lester.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): I bet you got a sister named Esther.
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): No, but I got another brother.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): What’s his name?
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Smitty.
Mr. Panky: Getting married, eh?
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Yeah.
Mr. Panky: Well, well, we can t be happy forever, you know.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): You got a hankie, Panky?
Sheriff Claude Stagg (George Bancroft): You must come up and have a Mint Julip with me sometime.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Yeah, we can get Southern fried.
Carol Lambert (Ann Rutherford): Don t be such a coward!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Who s a coward? I’m as brave as they go, and I m going.
Ellamae Downs (Diana Lewis): What do you think a ghost would say if he saw us coming down the stairs?
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): He’d say, Hello girls, because I d be gone!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Come out of there! Are you going to come out of there, or am I gonna have to run for my life?
Carol Lambert (Ann Rutherford): I don’t think it s safe down here. Someone was trying to kill us!
Ellamae Downs (Diana Lewis): It’s things like this that ruin our Southern hospitality.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): I think I dood it!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): For two cents, I’d punch you in the nose.
Sheriff Claude Stagg (George Bancroft): Why don t you do it?
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Well, money isn’t everything.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): It’s rather warm in here, we should open a window.
Carol Lambert (Ann Rutherford): We’re three levels underground, there are no windows!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Then don’t open one!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Hey Chester, did you ever escape from prison?
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Yeah, 2 different ways.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): How?
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Well, once I swapped places with a stiff that was fried.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): And the second time?
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): I swapped places with a geek that was hung.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): What are you, a one-idea man? Couldn t you think of anything but corpses?
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Don’t never fail, corpses always get out.
Carol Lambert (Ann Rutherford): Well, we’re all liable to be corpses pretty soon.
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Then we got nothing to worry about!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): What are you, a moron?
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): Yeah, and we re organized, too!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): [about the unconscious Sheriff in the rising water] He’s got one foot in heaven and one in a Turkish bath.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Say, what kind of town is this anyway?
Frank V. Bailie: A town where meddlers should carry heavy life insurance
Carol Lambert (Ann Rutherford): Why, look! There are two buzzards making a nest out of hay.
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): [Paranoid] Oh, no, they’re not. They’re probably drawing straws to see who gets me!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Had his neck in the noose, and pulled it out.
Chester Conway (Rags Ragland): That reminds me of my Uncle Steve! Only he didn’t pull it out.
Frank V. Bailie: [threatening Wally with a gun] Git back agin that wall!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): [cowardly] Thanks. I need something to hold me up.
Sheriff Claude Stagg: [Amid rising water] Someone help me up! I don’t want to drown like a rat!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): Well, you oughta know how!
Carol Lambert (Ann Rutherford): [Panicked] Oh, I hope I wake up in the morning and find it’s all a dream!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): I hope I wake up!
Wally The Fox Benton (Red Skelton): [after failing to walk through a wall] Pardon me. I thought I was Mr. Jordan!