Funny movie quotes from Nothing Sacred (1937) starring Fredric March, Carole Lombard, Charles Winninger
In Nothing Sacred, gullible newspaper reporter Fredric March thinks Carole Lombard is terminally ill., She’s not, but wants to visit New York City, so when he offers her an all-expenses paid visit …
Wally Cook: For good clean fun, there’s nothing like a wake.
Hazel Flagg: Oh please, let’s not talk shop.
The fight
Wally Cook: You mean to say you stood there and let me beat a defenseless woman?
Oliver Stone: I did, Mr. Cook.
Wally Cook: Where’s your sense of chivalry?
Oliver Stone: My chivalry? Aren’t you just a trifle confused, Mr. Cook? You hit her!
Wally Cook: That’s entirely different! I love her!
Hazel Flagg: I hate you!
Wally Cook: You’re going to have plenty of reasons to hate me. I’m going to show you cards and spades and lying for the next 50 years; I’m gonna pay you back for every lie you told. I’m gonna flirt and lie and cheat and swindle right through to our golden wedding.
Hazel Flagg: Yeah, yeah. Let me hit you just once.
Hazel Flagg: I’m a fake, huh? I’m a fake? What are you and that phony Santa Claus Oliver Stone slobbering and drooling over me? [Hits Wally] That’s for the heroines of history!
Enoch on newspapermen
Dr. Enoch Downer: I’ll tell you briefly what I think of newspaper men. The hand of God, reaching down into the mire, couldn’t elevate one of them to the depths of degradation!
Dr. Enoch Downer: [Speaking to Wally Cook] You’re a newspaperman. I can smell ’em. I’ve always been able to smell ’em. Excuse me while I open the window?
Wally Cook: You’ve lived here all your life?
Hazel Flagg: Twice that long.
Editor Oliver
Oliver Stone: Before I finish with that female Dracula, she’ll know one thing: that Oliver Stone is worse than radium poisoning four ways from the jack!
Wally Cook: I got in touch with Oliver, er, Oliver Stone my editor. He’s toe dancing in the street waiting for us.
Hazel Flagg: I hope he’s nice like you.
Wally Cook: Well he’s got a different quality of charm. He’s sort of a cross between a ferris wheel and a werewolf. But with a lovable streak if you care to blast for it.
Master of Ceremonies: [introducing on stage performer on horseback] Katinka who saved Holland by putting her finger in the dyke. Show them the finger babe.
Katinka: [extends bandaged middle finger to audience]
Hangover
Dr. Enoch Downer: I brought you something. Raw eggs! Just what you need. the albumin counteracts the alcohol. Suck ’em right down. It’ll settle your stomach. Go on! I got a whole dozen.
Hazel Flagg: Is this the way drunks feel?
Dr. Enoch Downer: Hazel, you’ve got what is known in medicine – as a hangover.
Hazel Flagg: I’ve got something worst than that. I’ve got a conscience. Oou!
Dr. Enoch Downer: Keep on suckin’ that egg and your conscience will go away.
Wally and Hazel
Wally Cook: Take that ice pack off your head and fight.
Hazel Flagg: No, no. What’s the use? Why fool them any longer?
Wally Cook: Because I love you. Because I’m going to marry you and I don’t want to spend my honeymoon hanging around Sing Sing blowing kisses to you in the exercise yard! Come on, stop dogging! You’ve got to be bathed in perspiration!
