Funny movie quotes from Pinocchio (1976) starring Danny Kaye, Sandy Duncan
Pinocchio: How much did that book cost?
Geppetto: That’s none of you business.
Pinocchio: Papa how did you pay for that book?
Geppetto: I no answer those questions.
Pinocchio: Papa, did you sell something?
Geppetto: I no sell anything!
Pinocchio: Where’s your coat?
Geppetto: I sold something.
Swindled
Boris Stroganoff: You’re going to be a sensation! With you as my star singing and dancing, cavorting…
Pinocchio: How can I cavort with a broken heart?
Boris Stroganoff: You’d like better a broken arm?
Pinocchio: No.
Pinocchio: If you don’t mind Mr. Stroganoff, for my performance today, I’ll just take half of these gold coins to bring home to Papa. What’s half of twenty-eight?
Boris Stroganoff: Five!
Fox: How would you like to bring home to your papa, not five, not fifty, but a thousand shiny gold coins?
Pinocchio: Is that more than five? I haven’t learned arithmetic yet.
Fox: It’s more than five. It’s even more than two!
Pinocchio: Rich is good?
Fox: Rich is always good.
Cat: Poor is always bad.
Pinocchio: Isn’t there anything in between?
Fox: Yes, aggravation.
Searching for Pinocchio
Fox: Come to think of it we, uh, we did see a little fella about so high.
Cat: Oh I think a little higher.
Geppetto: Where you see him?
Fox: Who’s giving the reward?
Geppetto: You tell me where, I’ll tell you who.
Fox: You tell us who, we’ll tell you where.
Geppetto: I don’t tell you who till you tell me where, and I tell you why. If I tell you who before you tell me where, you no tell me where. You’ll go to who and tell him where.
Cat: If we tell you where before you tell us who, you’ll go to who and tell him where.
Geppetto: I tell you what…
Fox: Just tell us who.
Geppetto: I’ll tell you when I tell you who! I tell you who when you tell me where!
Cat: We tell you where when you tell us who!
Fox: We’ll pay you to tell us!
Geppetto: Alright how much?
Fox: Five gold coins. [gives coins to Geppetto] Now who’s giving the reward?
Geppetto: Me.
Cat, Fox: You?
Fox: You’re just a poor wood carver!
Geppetto: [smiles and drops coins in his pocket] Not anymore.
Geppetto: What’s happening to you Pinocchio is you told a lie. And when you lie, it’s-a plain like the nose on you face.