Funny movie quotes from I’ll Take Sweden, starring Bob Hope, Tuesday Weld, Frankie Avalon, Dina Merrill
JoJo Holcomb: Kenny doesn’t have to work: his grandmother left him *twelve hundred* dollars!
Bob Holcomb: [touch of sarcasm] Twelve hundred dollars? With that kinda’ dough and a credit card, you got it made.
JoJo Holcomb: [Jojo and her father, Mr. Holcomb jump up on a coffee table amidst all the partiers] Hey, gang, this is my daddy!
Bob Holcomb: [nobody pays them the slightest attention; Bob looks a little crestfallen] I guess they don’t want any truck with Earth people.
JoJo Holcomb: [looking admiringly at Kenny Klinger] Oh, isn’t he something else?
Bob Holcomb: [obviously not impressed with him] You could say that, yes…
Bob Holcomb: Where’s Jojo?
Eloise: She’s out with Kenny.
Bob Holcomb: Oh, they’re probably out at another drive-in movie. How wrong can you go on a motor scooter?
Eloise: They didn’t go to a movie. He took her to some place called “The Pink Kitten.”
Bob Holcomb: [slightly taken aback] “The Pink Kitten”? You mean that place where the girls take off their… You let Kenny take her to a strip joint?
Eloise: Well, how did I know? I thought it was a pet store and they were gonna’ look at pussycats.
Bob Holcomb: Some “pussycats”!
Bob Holcomb: You speak excellent English for a Swede.
Karin Granstedt: Thank you! And you speak excellent English for an American.
Bob Holcomb: [slight pause] Touché.
[Upon seeing Erik’s Volkswagen]
Bob Holcomb: Maybe we had better put the car in our luggage.
Bob Holcomb: When you’re raising a daughter without the help of a mother, you feel twice as responsible. I’ve been doing it since she was five.
Karin Granstedt: She told me.
Bob Holcomb: I’ve seen her through dolls, roller skates… and those braces on her teeth. For about 4 years, she looked like she’d swallowed a TV antenna.
Karin Granstedt: I thought you liked Erik?
Bob Holcomb: Not when he talks like he’s buying an automobile and he’s not gonna’ buy one unless he “tries it out.”
Karin Granstedt: Bob, the world is full of Eriks!
Bob Holcomb: Yeah? Well, nobody’s gonna’ chalk up any mileage on JoJo, without getting a driver’s license first!
Bob Holcomb: So this is Hotel Idyllan?
Karin Granstedt: No, this is a summer resort for young people. I want you to see how innocent and wholesome everything is.
[just then a hot babe in a skimpy bikini walks by them, causing Bob to turn his head and watch]
Bob Holcomb: Okay, it’s a wonderful place. So let’s get on to Hotel Idyllan.
Karin Granstedt: No, after lunch. I want you to see how our young people enjoy sports. The accent here is on athletics.
[Bob watches as a young man and woman in bathing suits run by, hug and kiss, then run on]
Bob Holcomb: What do they specialize in here? Deep breathing? Think of all the years I wasted on golf!
Bob Holcomb: [another hot young couple in bathing suits frolicks past them] What was that? The 100-yard dash, or the running broad jump?
Hotel manager: Mr. Holcomb, if you don’t stop this nonsense, I’m going to have to call the police!
Bob Holcomb: “Nonsense”? My daughter’s in one of these rooms with a man!
Hotel manager: You’re lucky. Mine just sits in her room and cries.
Erik Carlson: I was just looking at the moon, and the stars… they pale next to the loveliness of you.
JoJo Holcomb: An American man would never say anything that beautiful.
Erik Carlson: I have something beautiful to inspire me.
[he proceeds to remove the top part of her negligee]