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Confucius says

Confucius says – The ‘wisdom’ of Confucius?

  • Man who have clear conscience usually have bad memory, too
  • Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes will soon burn out
  • When dentist say ‘€œopen wide’€ does he mean mouth or wallet?
  • Marriage is like playing poker’€”begin with a pair and end with a full house
  • Man who run behind car soon get exhausted
  • Even the greatest of whales is helpless in middle of desert
  • Man who open car door for girlfriend reveal one thing: either car is new or girlfriend is new
  • He who sitteth on an upturned tack with surely rise
  • Man who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser
  • Man who put head on Railroad track to listen for train likely to wake up with splitting headache
  • He who thinks only of number one must realize that this number is next to nothing
  • Woman who puts detergent on top shelf, jumps for Joy
  • Behind every successful man is good woman’€”and very surprised mother-in-law
  • Man who sit on tack gets the point!
  • Man who fall in molten glass make spectacle of himself
  • War doesn’€™t determine who is right, but who is left
  • Work to become, not to acquire
  • A man who has bird in hand finds it hard to blow nose
  • Man with one chopstick go hungry
  • Man who leaps off cliff jumps to conclusion
  • No husband ever been shot while he do dishes
  • Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get tone of A flat miner
  • When man bring wife for no reason, there usually reason
  • Man who cut himself while shaving lose face
  • He who place head in sand will get kicked in the
  • Man who keep both feet firmly planted on ground have trouble putting on pants
  • Those who quote me are fools.

5 thoughts on “Confucius says
  1. Boghos L. Artinian MD says:

    “Anyone can find the switch after the lights are on.”

    This quote is attributed to Confucius; unfortunately there were no switches nor light bulbs during his lifetime.

    1. admin says:

      You realize that these are all jokes, right?

  2. Boghos L. Artinian MD says:

    “Anyone can find the switch after the lights are on.”

    This quote is attributed to Confucius; unfortunately there were no switches nor light bulbs during his lifetime.

    1. admin says:

      You realize that these are all jokes, right?

  3. Confucious says:

    You forgot that the two go together
    “Man who run behind car get exhausted”
    “Man who run in front of car get tired”
    Also,
    “Man who stand on toilet get high on pot”

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