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Funny Tombstone Messages

Typically, the carvings on a grave marker give the deceased’s name, birth date, and death date. But sometimes they leave a funny tombstone message as well!
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Alexander Woolcott quotes

Alexander Woolcott quotes – snarky theater critic and writer. Even if you don’t recognize his name, you’ll definitely recognize one of his quotes below. Enjoy!
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Ozman’s Laws

Ozman’s Laws – something like Murphy’s Law, only more in a business setting. Except for the one about pizza! That’s true everyplace! Enjoy!
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Quit shooting off your mouth

Quit shooting off your mouth – From the Abbott and Costello radio show, circa 1940-ish Lou Costello: Do you brush your teeth with gunpowder? Sid Fields: No. Lou Costello: Then quit shooting off your mouth!
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Albert Einstein describes radio

Albert Einstein, when asked to describe radio, replied: “You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat.  You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles.  Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you...
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