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Frozen apple juice [pun alert]

So over the holiday, while visiting my mom, she asked me to run and pick up some groceries she had on her shopping list. So of course, I pack up my kids and we are off to the store. As I am perusing the juice aisle, my daughter...
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Did you hear about …

Did you hear about … a collection of punny jokes Moe: Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher? Larry: No, what about her? Moe: She had no control over her pupils.
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Walking economy

A man is walking down the street with his friend. He said to his friend, “I’m a walking economy.” His friend replied, “How’s that?” “It’s like this, my hair line is in recession, my stomach is a victim of inflation, and the combination of these factors is putting...
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Make me one with everything

A Buddhist monk, visiting New York City for the first time in twenty years, walked up to a hot dog vendor, handed him a twenty dollar bill, and said, “Make me one with everything.”
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The dying man’s request

There was an old man who lived by a forest. As he grew older and older, he started losing his hair, until one day, on his deathbed, he was completely bald. That day, he called his children to a meeting…
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Two atoms are walking down the street

Two atoms are walking down the street and they accidentally bump into each other. One says to the other, “Are you all right?” The second replies, “No, I lost an electron!” “Are you sure?” “Yes, I’m positive!”
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