Funny movie quotes from Way Out West – A young woman in the Wild West is about to lose her father’s deed to land grabbers, when galloping to the rescue come…Laurel and Hardy?
Funny movie quotes from Way Out West starring Stan Laurel, Oliver Hardy, James Finlayson
Sheriff: There’s one thing in this here town we don’t allow! And that’s messing with our women. Now if you want to stay healthy, you’ll catch the next coach out of town.
Oliver Hardy: Yes, sir.
Sheriff: And if you miss the next coach,
[draws revolver]
Sheriff: you’ll be riding out of here in a hearse.
[Walks away]
Stan Laurel: Goodbye.
Oliver Hardy: Let well enough alone.
Patron: Hey Finn, you’re a lucky man to have a swell gal like that.
Mickey Finn (Jimmy Finlayson): Yeah I … What are you talking about? She’s the lucky one to have a swell guy like me!
Mickey Finn (James Finlayson): [Every time Mickey pushes $1 on the bar’s cash register, the amount of $.10 comes up in the display; to bartender] Hey. This thing ain’t working right.
Bartender: It’s working all right for me.
Lola Marcel: Tell me about my dear, dear Daddy! Is it true that he’s dead?
Stan Laurel: We hope so, they buried him.
Lola Marcel: Tell, me, what did he die of?
Stan Laurel: I think he died of a Tuesday, or was it a Wednesday?
Oliver Hardy: Little Lady, you’ve heard the worst.
[smiles]
Oliver Hardy: Now prepare yourself for the best.
Stan Laurel: Now that you’ve got the mine, I’ll bet you’ll be a swell gold-digger.
Stan Laurel: We want to know why you’re not Mary Roberts!
Oliver Hardy: A lot of weather we’ve been having lately!
Oliver Hardy: This is another nice mess you’ve gotten me into!
Stan Laurel: That’s the first mistake we’ve made since that fellow sold us the Brooklyn Bridge.
Oliver Hardy: Buying that bridge was no mistake. That’s going to be worth a lot of money to us some day.
Stan Laurel: Your hat’s dry.
Oliver Hardy: Oh that reminds me, you made a statement this afternoon.
Stan Laurel: Did I?
Oliver Hardy: Mmm-hmmm. You said if we didn’t get the deed, you’d eat my hat.
Stan Laurel: Oh, now you’re taking me literally.
Oliver Hardy: Nevertheless, I’m going to teach you not to make rash promises.
[Puts hat in his lap]
Oliver Hardy: Eat the hat.
Stan Laurel: Oh that’s silly. Whoever heard of anybody eating a hat?
Oliver Hardy: Whoever heard of anybody doing *that*.
[Immitates Stan’s thumb lighter gimmick]
Oliver Hardy: Eat the hat!
Stan Laurel: [Gives it back] I won’t do it.
Oliver Hardy: [Slams it back in his lap] If you don’t eat that hat, I’ll tie you to a tree and let the buzzards get you!
Stan Laurel: Would you really do that?
Oliver Hardy: I certainly would.
[Stan says something incoherant due to him crying]
Oliver Hardy: [Showing no sympathy] Eat it.
Stan Laurel: Do you mind if I have another idea?
Oliver Hardy: If it’s anything like the last one, yes.
Stan Laurel: Wait a minute, while I spit on me hands.
Lola Marcel: [shows Finn the deed] Ha – *ha*!
Mickey Finn (James Finlayson): Ho – *ho*!
Oliver Hardy: [grabs the deed] He – *he*!
Oliver Hardy: Well, fan my brow! I’m from the South!
Mary Roberts: You are?
Stan Laurel: Well, shut my mouth! I’m from the South too!
Oliver Hardy: The South of what, sir?
Stan Laurel: The South of London.
Oliver Hardy: We’ll all go down to Dixie. Oh, for a slice of possum and yam. Mm!
Stan Laurel: Yes sir, and some good old fish and chips. I can smell ’em.
Oliver Hardy: [disgusted] Fish and chips!