Funny movie quotes from The Big Noise, starring Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy
Stan: You know what?
Oliver: What?
Stan: I’ve got a clue. I think Mr. Hartley is just a bit cracked. Well, I ought to know.
Oliver: All inventors are like that – they’re eccentric. They’re not like you and me.
Oliver: What a beautiful picture.
Alva P. Hartley: Yes, that cost a lot of money. It’s a Vandyke.
Stanley: A what?
Alva P. Hartley: A Vandyke. You know what a Vandyke is.
Stanley: Oh, yeah. My uncle had one, but he had to have it shaved off.
Oliver: Shh!
Stanley: What?
Oliver: Vandyke was a painter, not a beard.
Stan Laurel pours white paint on an expensive painting, ruining it. The owner cries out, “My Vandyke! Do you realize you’ve ruined my beautiful picture, ‘The Height of Spring’? What am I going to do?”
Stan Laurel replies, “You can call it, ‘The Depth of Winter’.”
[Stan and Ollie have been invited to dinner]
Oliver: I’m famished.
Alva P. Hartley: We’ll start with the turkey.
[he uncovers a tray holding a number of pills]
Alva P. Hartley: Will you have light meat or dark?
[Alva plunks some pills on the boys’ plates]
Stanley: Could I have another joint?
[after consuming his pills, Grandpa coughs violently]
Grandpa: I got a bone stuck in my throat.
Aunt Sophie: Don’t bolt your food, Grandpa. (to Stan and Ollie) He always does that, especially when we have fish.
Alva P. Hartley: Here you are, Junior.
[Alva hands Egbert his allotment of pills]
Egbert: Gee, the neck as usual. I’m getting capsule-happy now.