Funny movie quotes from Swiss Miss, starring Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy
Cheese Factory Proprietor: Now I’ve an idea.
Oliver, Stan: You’ve an idea?
Cheese Factory Proprietor: I’ll buy the whole business for five thousand gruel.
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): Why for you’re being so generous, we’ll throw in our mule.
Stan (Stan Laurel): You can’t do that, Ollie, don’t be such a fool.
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): It’s my idea! It’s just an idea of my own.
Stan (Stan Laurel): How often do they fill those barrels?
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): Every time they become empty. What’s on your mind?
Stan (Stan Laurel): Huh?
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): What’s on your mind.
Stan (Stan Laurel): Nothing.
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): That brandy is put there for a humane purpose, and anyone that would stoop so low as to touch it without a just cause should be shot!
Stan (Stan Laurel): He certainly should!
Stan (Stan Laurel): I see a monkey.
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): That doesn’t surprise me a bit
Anna: Are you afraid of me?
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): No, ma’am.
Anna: Do you like me?
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): Yes, ma’am.
Anna: And you, do you like me?
[Stan looks around to see who she’s talking to]
No, you!
Stan (Stan Laurel): I’m not gonna go across that bridge.
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): You just went across it!
Stan (Stan Laurel): I did?
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): Certainly!
[Stan looks down at what he just crossed over, and faints]
Anna: You’re so sweet. And I’ve never thanks you for getting me into this hotel.
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): It was a mere nothing combined with a terrific pleasure.
Chef: I thought I told you two not to come back here!
Stan (Stan Laurel): [in disguise] Who?
Chef: You!
Stan (Stan Laurel): You know what? He thinks we’re us!
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): [laughs]
Stan (Stan Laurel): Isn’t that silly? We’re not us, we’re two other fellas, aren’t we?
Ollie (Oliver Hardy): Certainly!
Chef: I could pick you two out of a million.
Stan (Stan Laurel): I bet you couldn’t.
Chef: I bet I could.
Stan (Stan Laurel): I bet you couldn’t.
Chef: I bet I could!
Stan (Stan Laurel): Close your eyes. [Stan and Ollie run away while his eyes are covered]