Funny Responses to pick-up lines

Funny Responses to pick-up lines – Ladies, are you tired of hearing the same old pick-up lines? Wouldn’t you like to respond with a withering, snarky answer? Here you go!

“I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
“It’s in the phone book.”
“But I don’t know your name.”
“That’s in the phone book too.”

“I want to give myself to you.”
“Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.”

“Haven’t I seen you someplace before?”
“Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.”

He: So what do you do for a living?
She: Female impersonator.

“Is this seat empty?”
“Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.”

“So, wanna go back to my place?”
“Well, I don’t know. Will two people fit under a rock?”

“What sign were you born under?”
“No Parking.”

“I know how to please a woman.”
“Then please leave me alone.”

“Haven’t we met before?”
“Yes, I’m the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic.”

“I can tell that you want me.”
“Ohhhh. You’re so right. I want you… to leave.”

“Hey, baby, What’s your sign?”
“Stop.”

“Hey cutie, how ’bout you and I hitting the hot spots?”
“Sorry, I don’t date outside my species.”

“May I see you pretty soon?”
“Why? Don’t you think I’m pretty now?”

“Your body is like a temple.”
“Sorry, there are no services today.”

“I’d go through anything for you.”
“Good! Let’s start with your bank account.”

“I would go to the end of the world for you.”
“Yes, but would you stay there?”

Guy: “Haven’t I seen you someplace before?”
Girl: “Yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.”

“Your place or mine?”
“Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine.”

He: So, wanna go back to my place?
She: Well, I don’t know. Will two people fit under a rock?

After hearing a pickup line:
I like your approach, now let’s see your departure.

He: Do you wanna dance?
She: Yeah but not with you!

Q: Does beauty run in your family?
A: It obviously doesn’t in yours!

Q: What’s your name sexy?
A: Taken!

Q: Do you believe in love at first sight or do you want me to walk by again?
A: Yeah, but this time don’t stop!

Q: I think you’re the best looking girl in here.
A: Really? Well, I’d better go find the best looking guy then, hadn’t I!

He: So, baby, your place or mine?
She: Both. You’ll go to your place and I’ll go to mine!

Q: Can I buy you a drink?
A: Go ahead, but only if you buy my boyfriend one too!

“You look like a dream.”
Response: “Go back to sleep.”

He: What`s it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?
She: What`s it like being the biggest liar in the world?

“I can see forever in your eyes.”
Response: “But all I can see is never in yours.”

“I looked up beautiful in the thesaurus today and your name was included.”
Response: “Thanks! Hey, I saw your name next to jerk.”

Author

Tom Raymond

Professional clown who loves to laugh - happily married for 29 years, with 5 children and 1 grandson. Servant of Jesus Christ.

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