Funny movie quotes from Flushed Away, starring Hugh Jackman, Kate Winslet, Ian McKellen
[as Roddy is sent flying through a clothesline]
Passerby: Is it a bird?
Passerby #2: Is it a plane?
Passerby #3: Is that guy wearing my underpants?
Tadpole: Is it the Glorious Amphibian Dawn, dad?
Toad (Ian McKellen): Anything for you, my little man.
Tadpole: Can I have a pony?
Toad: No.
Tadpole: A puppy?
Toad: We’ll talk about it.
Tadpole: Can we talk about it now?
Toad: No!
[All the tadpoles start asking for puppies]
Toad: No, you can’t all have puppies! Please, daddy’s working!
Rita (Kate Winslet): Tell me about yourself, Roddy.
Roddy (Hugh Jackman): Well, there’s not much to tell.
Rita: You know everything about me, warts and all. I don’t even know what you do.
Roddy: I’m… I’m in a boy band.
Rita: What?
Roddy: Yeah. Yeah, I’m the posh one.
Liam: He’s gonna steal your boat.
Rita: He won’t steal my boat.
Liam: He’s stealing your boat.
Rita: He isn’t stealing…
Liam: He stole your boat.
Rita: What?
Liam: He’s like Robin Hood in reverse.
Roddy: [hanging on to Rita’s belt as it starts to break] No, no don’t break! There are things I want to do, sights I want to see.
[belt breaks; Rita’s pants drop]
Roddy: That wasn’t on the list.
Roddy: And who might you be, little chap?
Shocky: They call me Shocky.
Roddy: Why do they call you that?
Shocky: [Shocks Roddy with a battery] Shocky!
Roddy: Ohh! Yes, got it.
Roddy: Whatever’s going on, I assure you, I’m not involved. I’m just an innocent bystander.
Spike: Rita, Rita, Rita.
[laughs]
Spike: Thought you could give us the slip?
[Slips and falls]
Spike: What are you looking at? Keep still! Come on, then! Right! Who have we got here?
Whitey: I believe he said his name was Millicent Bystander.
Toad: You find my pain amusing?
Le Frog: I find everyone’s pain amusing, except my own… I’m French!
Le Frog: We leave immediately!
[strides off screen]
Henchfrog #1: What about supper?
Le Frog: [strides back on screen] We leave in five hours!
Rita: What are you, some kind of rat boomerang? Give me back my ruby!
Roddy: I haven’t got your ruby!
[the ruby falls on his hand]
Roddy: Okay. Well, now I’ve got your ruby.
Le Frog: To action!
Henchfrogs: We surrender!
Le Frog: Not that action, you idiots! The kung-fu thing!
Whitey: Are you sure about this, Spike? These things are dangerous.
Spike: Danger is my middle name!
Whitey: I thought it was Lesley.
Le Frog: This bizarre obsession with rats; it is not good for you. You are becoming what we French call “le fruitcake!”
Roddy: Will you please tell these people I’m not involved in this?
Rita: Fine. All right, all right, listen up. This gentleman, he’s not from around here.
Roddy: Thank you.
Rita: Just look how nicely he’s dressed.
Roddy: Ah, thank you.
Rita: And why? Because he’s an international jewel thief!
Roddy: Precisely… What? No, no!
Toad: You wretched vermin! I’ll make you pay for this!
Le Frog: Ah, give it a rest, cousin… and get your kids a puppy.
Fly: He’s a mad man! Run away, run…
[the Toad swallows the fly]
Toad: Pardon me, my fly’s undone.
Thimblenose Ted: Hey guys, I just had a tipoff. They’re heading west, to Kensington.
Spike: Bingo!
Whitey: Scrabble!
Spike: Enough games! To the Ratmobiles!
Toad: [to Le Frog] Perhaps you forget that it was a rat who cast me from paradise.
Le Frog: [Rolling his eyes] Oh please not the scrapbook again.
Toad: [pulls a book off a shelf] My memoirs , volume one details the dire and tragic story of my youth.
Le Frog: Oh mon dieu.
Toad: Of all the pets in Buckingham palace , young prince charles fancied me the best , we would frolic day after sunny day in royal abandon sharing that sweet and magical bond between boy and toad.
Le Frog: Your going to make me throw up.
Toad: We were inseparable until… it arrived THAT RAT , while the poor boys head was turned , I was cruelly plunged into a whirlpool of despair.
Le Frog: I know I know you were flushed away down the loo right? boo hoo hoo, it is so dark, so cold, so terrible
[chuckles]
Le Frog: .
Toad: You find my pain funny?
Le Frog: I find everyone’s pain funny but my own, I’m French.
Toad: [stands up and knocks over a table] Just get that cable.