Valentines Day jokes for married couples
- A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
- A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
- Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves.
After marriage, the ‘y’ becomes silent.
And so does the husband. - A husband said to his wife,
‘No, I don’t hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law better than I like mine.’ - The honeymoon is over when the husband calls home to say he’ll be late for dinner and the answering machine says it is in the microwave.
- Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage.
They’ve experienced pain and bought jewelry. - A little boy asked his father, ‘Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?’
And the father replied, ‘I don’t know, son, I’m still paying for it.’ - A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided not to report it because the thief was spending less than his wife did.
- Love is blind but marriage is an eye-opener.
- The most effective way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once.
- Cosmetics: A woman’s way of keeping a man from reading between the lines.
- Words to live by: Do not argue with a spouse who is packing your parachute
- Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.
- Marriage is a three ring circus:
The engagement ring
The wedding ring
The suffering