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President Obama tries to cash a check

President Obama tries to cash a check – but how can he prove his identity?

President Barack Obama, surrounded by his normal retinue of Secret Service agents, walks into the Chicago branch office of a regional bank to cash a check.

‘€œGood morning, ma’€™am,’€ he says to the cashier. ‘€œI’€™d like to cash this check.’€

‘€œOf course, sir,’€ she replies. ‘€œDo you have your drivers license?’€

‘€œActually, no,’€ Obama says. ‘€œI didn’€™t drive myself and, honestly, I didn’€™t think I’€™d need to show any ID. I mean, I am the president.’€

‘€œYes, sir, I know who you are. But I’€™m afraid that, federal banking regulations being what they are, I’€™ll need to see a photo ID.’€

Obama sighs in consternation.

‘€œBut just ask anyone at the bank,’€ he says. ‘€œThey all know who I am. Everybody knows who I am.’€

‘€œI’m sorry, Mr. President, but rules are rules.’€

‘€œPlease, there must be something you can do. I need to cash this check so I can buy Michelle a Valentine’€™s Day present.’€

The cashier thinks for a minute.

‘€œI’ll tell you what, Mr. President. Two weeks ago, Tiger Woods was here and in the same situation. He proved who he was by making an amazing putt all the way across the bank lobby into a coffee cup.

‘€œThen, just last week, Andre Agassi had to prove who he was, so he used his tennis racket and lobbed a ball all the way across the bank lobby into that same coffee cup.

‘€œIn both cases, we took that as identification and cashed their checks,’€ she explained.

‘€œSo, Mr. President, is there something you can do that would prove that you are, indeed, Barack Hussein Obama, President of the United States?’€ she asked.

Obama stands in front of her for a moment, frowning in thought.

‘€œYou know, he says, I can’t think of a thing. My mind is a total blank. I have absolutely no idea what to do in this situation,’€ he says. ‘€œSeriously. No clue at all.’€

The cashier smiles.

‘€œWill that be large or small bills, Mr. President?’€ she asks.

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