Customer: Do you serve crabs here?
Waiter: We serve anyone — please have a seat.
Customer: Do you have pig’s feet?
Waiter: Yes, sir.
Customer: Well, if you wear shoes no one will notice.
Customer: Waiter, there’s a fly in my soup!
Waiter: Don’t worry sir, the spider on the bread roll will get ’em.
Customer: Waiter, there is a dead fly swimming in my soup!
Waiter: Don’t be silly, sir, dead flies can’t swim!
Customer: Waiter, there is a fly in the butter!
Waiter: Yes sir, it’s a butterfly!
Atheist: Waiter, what’s this fly doing in my soup?
Waiter: Praying.
Atheist: Very funny. I can’t eat this. Take it back.
Waiter: You see? The fly’s prayers were answered.
Customer: Waiter! This soup isn’t fit for a pig!
Waiter (as he takes away the soup): I’m sorry, sir — I’ll bring you some that is.
Customer: Do you have frog legs?
Waiter: Yes, sir.
Customer: Then hop into the kitchen, and bring me a hamburger.
