Christmas string

Christmas string
One Christmas Eve, when all the presents had been wrapped, there were just three pieces of string left. “€˜You know, we’ll probably just be thrown on the fire,”€™ String Number 1 said. “€˜Or in the garbage!”€™ String Number 2 moaned. “€˜We can’t have that!”€™ String Number 3 cried. “€˜So...
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‘Twas the night before Jesus came

Twas the night before Jesus came
Twas the night before Jesus came and all through the house. Not a creature was praying, not one in the house. Their Bibles were lain on the shelf without care In hopes that Jesus would not come there. The children were dressing to crawl into bed, Not once...
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Your forefathers

Bud Abbott and Lou Costello
Your forefathers – classic Abbott and Costello comedy from their movie, Comin’ Round the Mountain [after walking into an old beat-down cabin] Wilbert (Lou Costello): How could my kin folks ever live in a joint like this? Al Stewart (Bud Abbott): Probably your forefathers lived here. Wilbert (Lou Costello):...
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What’s the name of your ranch?

Cowboy 1: What’s the name of your ranch? Cowboy 2: Well, it the X-Y-Z C-Double D-Bar-B-Q central western consolidated ranch. Cowboy 1: Wow! That’s quite the mouthful! Do you have many cattle? Cowboy 2: No, only a few; most of them don’t survive the branding.  
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What is Murphy’s Law?

Top ten list of Murphy's Law for moms - mothers will read this, laugh, and smile!
What is Murphy’s Law? Anything that can go wrong will! What is Cole’s Law? The punchline! Enjoy the joke! Clown 1: What is Murphy’s Law? Clown 2: “Anything that can go wrong, will.” Clown 1: Good. And what is Segal’s law?
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What do you call cold tea?

What do you call cold tea? – a build-up to a funny joke! enjoy! Clown 1: ‘€œWhat do you call cold tea?’€ Clown 2: ‘€œIced tea.’€ Clown 1: ‘€œWhat do you call cold coffee?’€ Clown 2: ‘€œIced coffee.’€ Clown 1: ‘€œWhat do you call cold ink?’€ Clown 2:...
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How tired was he?

How tired was he? About this tired … Person 1: You wouldn’€™t believe how tired my friend was. Person 2: Sure, I would. Person 1: No, you wouldn’€™t Person 2: Try me. Person 1: My friend was so tired, he fell asleep during his nap!  
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The new pastor is too young?

Parishioner 1: What do you think of the new pastor? I enjoyed his sermon this morning. Parishioner 2: I didn’t.  He’s too young to preach! Parishioner 1: Why do you say that?
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