Home » Church and God jokes » If Biblical Headlines were written by today’s newspapers
If Biblical Headlines were written by today's newspapers

If Biblical Headlines were written by today’s newspapers

If Biblical Headlines were written by today’s newspapers

On Moses and the children of Israel crossing the Red Sea:
WETLANDS TRAMPLED IN LABOR STRIKE
Pursuing Environmentalists Killed

On David vs. Goliath:
HATE CRIME KILLS BELOVED CHAMPION
Psychologist Questions Influence of Rock

On Elijah on Mt. Carmel:
FIRE SENDS RELIGIOUS RIGHT EXTREMIST INTO FRENZY
400 Killed

On the birth of Christ:
HOTELS FULL, ANIMALS LEFT HOMELESS
Animal Rights Activists Enraged by Insensitive Couple

On feeding the 5,000:
PREACHER STEALS CHILD’S LUNCH
Disciples Mystified Over Behavior

On healing the 10 lepers:
LOCAL DOCTOR’S PRACTICE RUINED
“Faith Healer” Causes Bankruptcy

On healing of the Gadarene demoniac:
MADMAN’S FRIEND CAUSES STAMPEDE
Local Farmer’s Investment Lost

On raising Lazarus from the dead:
FUNDAMENTALIST PREACHER RAISES A STINK
Will Reading to be Delayed

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