Funny movie quotes from Wife vs. Secretary

Funny movie quotes from Wife vs. Secretary, starring Clark Gable, Myrna Loy, Jean Harlow

Helen ‘Whitey’ Wilson (Jean Harlow): You’re a fool, for which I am grateful.

[kisses Linda while her eyes are closed]
Van (Clark Gable): Guess who!
Linda (Myrna Loy): Hmm… Simpson?
Van (Clark Gable): No!
[kisses her again]
Van (Clark Gable): Try again!
Linda (Myrna Loy): Finny.
Van (Clark Gable): No!
[kisses her again]
Van (Clark Gable): Try again!
Linda (Myrna Loy): I give up.
[opens her eyes as they laugh and embrace]
Linda (Myrna Loy): Oh! It’s a husband!

Simpson: [to maid] Whether Mr. Stanhope touches his trout or not is no concern of yours!

Party Guest with Herbert: [looking lasciviously at Whitey as she dances past him] Gentlemen, I fear that even I could give that little lady dictation.

Linda (Myrna Loy): Well, after all, Van, she is an uncommonly good-looking girl. I don’t know of anyone in our crowd who’s as attractive, and people aren’t willing to believe that looks go with brains.
Van (Clark Gable): Well, one of the smallest troubles we’ve ever had, Linda, is caring what other people think.

Mimi (May Robson): My dear, men are like that. So honorable and wise in some things and just like naughty children in others. You wouldn’t blame a little boy for stealing a piece of candy if left alone with a whole boxful, will you?

Joan Carstairs: There’s an old Chinese proverb that says if you want to keep a man honest, never call him a liar.

Van (Clark Gable): Who won the fight?
Simpson: Rosenblaum. In the third round.
Van (Clark Gable): He did? I owe Finny a night off.
Simpson: Well with your night off and my three dollars, Finny should do quite well.
Van (Clark Gable): You too? Maybe we should get rid of Finny.

[after Linda finds a bracelet hidden in her trout]
Van (Clark Gable): Don’t start asking me to go whale fishing.

Van (Clark Gable): You know, it’s amazing how a man can twist logic to suit his own ends.

Van (Clark Gable): Me? I haven’t done that in years. That’s work!

Linda (Myrna Loy): The world’s divided into two kinds of people: those who believe that bow tie ends should be sticking out, and those who don’t. Personally, I’m very tolerant, ask anybody. But anyone who believes a bow tie end should stick out should be deported from this country.


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