Funny movie quotes from Hans Christian Andersen (1952) starring Danny Kaye
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): You’d be surprised how many kings are only a queen with a mustache.
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): Stop shaking your head at me, Peter. I can feel it in the back of my head.
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): Did you ever hear the story of the old woman who shook her head at the family so much that one night it fell off? Right on the dinner table.
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): You know, I never saw such a worrier as you, Peter. You want to worry? I’ll give you something to worry about. Two years ago I took you out of that orphanage and promised them I’d make you into a good cobbler. Two whole years! Look at that shoe. Glue’s all smeared, the nails go in crooked. Two years an apprentice and still the nails go in crooked.
Peter (Joseph Walsh): I’m not as bad as all that, am I? You’re not going to send me back, are you?
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): Ah! A new worry appears in the sky.
[about Hans’s stories]
Gerta’s Father, Farmer: The other day I asked my Gerta what time it was and she said that the minute hand and the hour hand weren’t speaking to each other. They were both in love with the second hand. And they wouldn’t make up until they met at twelve o’clock. And no one could tell the time until then.
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): You know I like to think that shoes have a mind of their own. The ones that squeak don’t want to leave the shop, and the ones that don’t fit don’t like the person that’s wearing them.
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): [talking to dog] That’s the nice thing about the world, my friend: People.
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): No one’s ever really alone.
[working on a beautiful ballerina’s shoes]
Hans Christian Andersen (Danny Kaye): She wants shoes that can walk on air, Peter; this afternoon. I almost wish she’d asked me for something really impossible.
Niels (Farley Granger): You dance the waltz like an elephant in a snowdrift! No, like an elephant that’s fallen and trying to get up!
Otto (Philip Tonge): Never interfere between a husband and wife, my boy. Best rule I ever heard of.
Peter (Joseph Walsh): What funny people they are over there. First they laugh and kiss, then they scream and beat each other. Kind of crazy.